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So first of all let me say that the title of my book, Jack Gets His Man, is a clever play on words. Am I going to get my man as in catch the thief stealing from my store? Or am I going to get a man as in find love? To be perfectly honest, I kind of suck at the whole figuring out the theft thing. Apparently this fabulous body was not built to be a detective. I’m just going to stick to advice about finding love.
Tip #1 – Never look a gift date in the mouth. It may sound pathetic but the Gray-Haired Knitting Detectives set me up on two dates. Now, I may not have found love with those dates but I definitely made some friends and I could have found love.
Tip #2 – Go forwards not backwards. Do not under any circumstances have relations with an ex that is still holding a candle for you. Not only is the next morning awkward but it could ruin your chance for love if that ex turns into the green-eyed monster and chases other prospects away. Now if I could only learn to follow my own advice.
Tip #3 – Be a rule breaker. Rules are there for a reason but they are also made to be broken –sometimes. I’m not supposed to be dating my employees – boring! – because I allegedly had some issues with an employee or two thinking I was using them in the past. Anyway, I may or may not be in a relationship with an employee now. It’s probably best to discuss how to handle the relationship on the work floor before going past first – well definitely third – base.
Tip #4 – Make your move when your man can’t get away. Don’t trap him or anything because that might be misconstrued as kidnapping or something. Just maneuver yourself into a situation where the man needs to take care of you. If he jumps at the chance to take care of you, it’s time for you to jump him.
Everything seems to be going well in Jack’s life. His store is busy making money hand over fist and his best friend has found love. The new bookkeeper at the store discovers things aren’t actually as they seem. Someone is playing fast and loose with the store accounts. Jack’s bestie and his knitting group fancy themselves detectives and jump at the chance to solve Jack’s problems. When they aren’t re-enacting scenes from Mission: Impossible, they’re setting Jack up on dates and generally insinuating themselves into his love life. They’re determined to find love for Jack as well as his missing money. Will Jack catch a thief or find love? Either way Jack’s going to get his man.
The first candidate arrived promptly at 9:30 or at least his mom did. Danny ushered an elderly lady with a stern bun into Jack’s office and made a hasty retreat.
Jack just stared at her until Izzy cleared her throat and poked him in the ribs. “I’m sorry,” she said when Jack kept staring. “We were expecting someone named Fred. Is that you?”
The woman looked first at Jack and then at Izzy. “Of course that’s not me,” she snapped. “What kind of name is Fred for a woman?”
“Er.. um,” Izzy stumbled. “Do you know where Fred is?”
The woman rolled her eyes and harrumphed. “He’s in the bathroom. He always gets nervous at interviews.”
“Um. Okay,” Izzy was quick to respond when she saw Jack opening his mouth. Knowing Jack nothing appropriate was coming out of his mouth at the moment. “Can you have a seat outside while we conduct the interview?” Izzy could do prim and proper when necessary.
The woman gave Izzy the evil eye before turning on her heel and walking out. They never saw Fred.
Jack was licking his fingers when Danny ushered in the next candidate. “Hi!,” the enthusiastic candidate nearly shouted. “I’m Tim!” That part was definitely shouted.
Jack and Izzy stood to shake the man’s hand. He swayed a bit as he leaned forward. Jack took a sniff, but didn’t smell anything untoward. Tim collapsed in his seat while Jack stared at his hand in disgust. Tim’s hands were sweaty. Jack’s mouth pulled tight in a grimace and his nose scrunched in disgust.
“So Tim. Why do you want this job?” Izzy’s voice was overly enthusiastic in an attempt to bring Tim’s attention to her so he wouldn’t see Jack’s grimace. She need not have bothered. Tim had leaned back in the chair and closed his eyes. When he didn’t respond, Izzy snapped her fingers. “Tim?”
“Huh? What?” He started.
“Have you been drinking?” Jack didn’t even bother to ask in a polite manner.
Tim shrugged. “Just a tiny drink to settle my nerves.”
Jack stood. “Okay. Thanks a lot for coming. We’ll be in touch.”
Tim looked confused but managed to struggle to his feet and lurch out of the door. Izzy was giggling uncontrollably by the time Jack sat back down. He snorted. “At least this isn’t boring.”
I was born and raised in Wisconsin, but think I’m a European. After spending my senior year of high school in Germany, I developed a bad case of wanderlust that is yet to be cured. My flying Dutch husband and I have lived in Ohio, Virginia, the Netherlands, Germany and now Istanbul. We still haven’t decided if we want to settle down somewhere – let alone where. Although I’ve been a military policewoman, a commercial lawyer, and a B&B owner, I think with writing I may have finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up. That’s assuming I ever grow up, of course. Between tennis, running, traveling, singing off tune, drinking entirely too many adult beverages, and reading books like they are going out of style, I write articles for a local expat magazine and various websites, review other indie authors’ books, write a blog about whatever comes to mind and am working on my sixth book.
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