Friday, December 18, 2015

Straight Browsing from the Library: The Big Fat Mermaid by Dweezel and Pallie


This post is part of a virtual book tour organized by Goddess Fish Promotions. Dweezel and Pallie will be awarding a $30 Amazon/BN GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour. Click on the tour banner to see the other stops on the tour.

READ THE BLURB


She's nasty, she's gross, and she's anything but little. All Aria the mermaid princess wants is to stuff her face full of food, but what happens when her dad, the king, tries to stop her? The answer: laughs beyond belief! Watch as Aria deals with her mean dad, a chubby-chasing prince, a harpoon wielding sea captain, and, in a grand final battle, the monstrous water witch herself.

Aria will bite, belch, and fart her way into your heart in this second installment of the Funny Stories for Kids series, brought to you by the famed Dweezel and Pallie.

READ AN EXCERPT


“Oh, good,” said Crustacean, swimming into a long, dark, stinking, dirty dungeon. It’s cells were full of sad looking sea citizens. “See, Tortly, dis gonna be easy! It like I always say, a good Crustacean is a--”

Crustacean swam directly into a shark.

The shark turned around and growled, showing its wide smile of sharp teeth.

“Oh my!” Crustacean gasped.

“Intruders!” shouted the shark. He opened his mouth and went to bite Crustacean.

Crustacean dodged the charging shark with some quick swimming moves, but Tortly, behind him, was too slow. Tortly screamed and went into his shell.

The shark caught Tortly in his mouth. He bit down on the turtle’s shell, which became wedged in his mouth.

Crustacean come from behind now and began pinching the shark with his lobster pincers.

“Take some of dis,” Crustacean shouted, poking and pinching, “And some of dis! Not so tough now without you scary teeth!”

Crustacean wound up his little red claws and poked them both into the shark's eyes.

MEET THE AUTHOR


Dr. Dweezel and Professor Pallie have become famed in their respective fields for outstanding contributions. For nearly a decade they have collaborated on the recording of lost ancient texts and tales.

To download "The Big Fat Mermaid" visit the Website or Facebook

ENTER THE GIVEAWAY


a Rafflecopter giveaway
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23 comments:

  1. Goddess Fish PromotionsDecember 18, 2015 at 5:04 AM

    Thanks for hosting!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mai T.December 18, 2015 at 6:52 AM

    What is your proudest accomplishment?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:23 PM

      Thanks for the question. One such accomplishment comes to mind and would be the time I recovered of the lost Scepter of King Ubara-Tutu.

      Delete
    2. DweezelDecember 20, 2015 at 9:45 PM

      This was a great accomplishment, Parnassus. As for myself I would have to say my astonishing academic achievements, including the creation of this story!

      Delete
  3. Rita WrayDecember 18, 2015 at 1:25 PM

    Great excerpt and fun title.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:28 PM

      Thanks. What was you're favorite part of the excerpt?

      Delete
  4. Victoria AlexanderDecember 18, 2015 at 1:32 PM

    Really great excerpt - thanks for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:29 PM

      Thanks. What did you like about the excerpt?

      Delete
    2. Victoria AlexanderDecember 18, 2015 at 6:38 PM

      It made me LOL.. this part in particular:

      “Take some of dis,” Crustacean shouted, poking and pinching, “And some of dis! Not so tough now without you scary teeth!”

      :D

      Delete
    3. DweezelDecember 20, 2015 at 9:50 PM

      Crustacean has some good lines.

      Delete
  5. Stormy VixenDecember 18, 2015 at 3:20 PM

    Sounds like a fun time, thanks for sharing and have a wonderful holiday season!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:25 PM

      You're welcome, you have a wonderful Holiday season too!

      Delete
  6. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:07 PM

    Awesome post, thank you for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
  7. UnknownDecember 18, 2015 at 4:30 PM

    Thank you “ Librarian Judith” for hosting this spotlight of “The Big Fat Mermaid.” We’re excited to be here and ready to answer any questions your readers have!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Quilt LadyDecember 18, 2015 at 9:44 PM

    Enjoyed the excerpt, sounds like this might be cute. Entering under the name of Virginia

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. DweezelDecember 20, 2015 at 9:47 PM

      What does this mean, you are entering under Virginia?

      Delete
  9. Quilt LadyDecember 18, 2015 at 9:44 PM

    Enjoyed the excerpt, sounds like this might be cute. Entering under the name of Virginia

    ReplyDelete
  10. DweezelDecember 20, 2015 at 9:51 PM

    Just so you are all aware, "The Big Fat Mermaid" is currently on sale for .99, and will be until some time after new years.

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousDecember 27, 2015 at 6:20 PM

    Enjoyed the excerpt

    ReplyDelete
  12. Ana ValenteDecember 29, 2015 at 1:27 PM

    Looks like it might be funny :) Probably wouldn't be aware of this book otherwise, thanks :)
    (Ana M on Rafflecopter)

    ReplyDelete
  13. KarrieDecember 30, 2015 at 9:27 PM

    oh god this looks hilarious!!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. UnknownDecember 31, 2015 at 10:59 PM

    This looks great! My nephew would really enjoy it!

    ReplyDelete

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